In like a lion

I don't know about you but I am sooo glad that April is over with. You know Alexander and his terrible horrible no good day, well April was Cindal's terrible horrible no good month. I've never been happier to put something in my rearview. I'm also hoping that since April was the proveribial lion with gnashing teeth and razor claws that maybe sweet May will be the fuzzy warm little lamb who puts us back together again.
I suppose you're wondering what exactly happened in April. Maybe you're not, maybe you could care less. If that's the case stop reading, go on about your life, and be happy that your April was not like mine. April started off with doctor's appointments, needles, and blood. One right after the other for me and for him. We went in for what amounts to be physicals, the just checking kind of appointments. Turns out I'm fine, not anemic or hypothyroidic as people have so often suggested to me.All my hormones in line. I learned my blood is A+. All well and good. My husband didn't fair as well. The dr. suspected he might have diabetes. Two more appointments and blood draws later, it was confirmed with an A1C level of 9. For those of you who don't know a 7 or over is diabetic. Everything sorta spirals out of control at this point. We're going to the gym, watching what we eat like hawks, making daily trips into town to test his blood pressure, basically changing our entire way of life. It's hard, but not intolerable. However April decides to heap on. His car breaks down leaving us with one vehicle and my motorcycle. The extra dr. bills and medications put a strain on our finances in an already bill heavy month. Then my mother-in-law has a stroke, that puts her in the hospital and as of the end of the month a nursing home. My father-in-law decides to be a rat bastard and refuses to help take care of, starts talking about selling all her stuff including their house, and blames us for not doing more. Watching my husband go through this has been more rough than many of you can imagine. Not being able to do anything to help, not being able to fix it, is horrible. There are so many days I just want to be an ostrich, to stick my head in the sand and pretend that life isn't out there. Stress takes its toll on both of us. My jaw where I've struggled against TMJ gets stiff again, I start having 'night paralysis' episodes again complete with wonderful hallucinations *sarcasm*, dark circles bleed out from under my eyes. I watch as my husband struggles to sleep, struggles with his pills in the morning, pricks his fingers, shakes when the stress overwhelms. Ontop of that it's rained all month it seems like and our basement flooded, well not flooded but a good inch or two of water in few places. It's been hard.
And now for my monthly resolution update.

1. Weight loss. Like I mentioned earlier as soon as we were told of the suspected diabetes I got us memberships to the local rec center. We've gone two to three days a week for an hour at a time every week this month. I think my husband lost about 10 lbs. I'm so proud of him. He has done so well with the exercising and the new diet. My beginning weight this month was 144.2 lbs. My highest weight was 144.4 and my lowest weight was 140.4 lbs. At the end of the month it was 142.6. I think all and all it would be fair to say that I lost about 2 lbs. As far as waist measurements go beginning was 27.0, high was 27.1, low was 26.3 and end was 26.5. So I've lost another half an inch off my waist.  Again there's no way I'm going to make my goal of the end of June. But I already feel much better, my heart I know is in better condition and I'm not getting out of breath at the slightest provocation anymore.
2. 50 books in a year. I read 6 books this month and got back on track. So far I've read and reviewed a total of 15 books. I'm almost a third of the way to my goal. I'm pretty sure I can reach it.
3. Dark Divinity. Did you read the first part of this post? Yeah I didn't write. At all. But I've done some pretty cool artwork for some of my other books.
4. Fairytree. It rained all month, I'm sure I mentioned that once before. Which doesn't bode well for a photographer who does most of her work outdoors in natural light. I did however meet and book two more wedding clients for later in the year.
5. Nothing new on the remodeling front again, aside from I got a few plants for our deck and garden.

I'm ready for May. I'm ready for a fresh take and a fresh start. We will walk through the fire and come out tempered on the other side.  For everyone struggling out there, you are not alone even when it feels like you are, you are stronger than you know, and you will overcome.